Cindy Dam
My name is Cindy Dam. I have been born and raised in the Bay Area. I am currently in Hayward, California. My parents were both born in Saigon, Vietnam and had immigrated to the U.S. My father came to the U.S. at the age of 18 and had to drop out of high school to get a job since he was the only one in his family that was in the U.S. Now being in a family of six with parents only making enough to live paycheck by paycheck, it has been hard. It was hard for my parents to look after me, the middle child, because I have two siblings almost a decade younger then me. Even though I have an older brother, I was often depended on to do most of the work around the house. From filling out applications for Medi-Cal to writing checks to pay bills, I was beginning to hold a parental figure in the house because my parents were not fluent in English despite being in the U.S. for more than a decade. My parents have just recently separated; my dad is living with my younger siblings and I live with my mom and my older brother who just left for the Navy. Ever since my parents separated I never felt as if I belonged anywhere anymore. I am constantly rotating between my parents and involving myself in many activities in school that it is hard for me balance my time.
Fours years ago, my father was diagnosed with diabetes and I was the only one in my family that knew anything that was going on. I would help my dad with his peritoneal dialysis every night. As time went on, my dad became even more ill. When my parents separated, it put some strain into our family. My dad stopped going to his doctor appointments and my mom started to work more often. No matter how many times I tell my dad to continue going to the doctors, he would refuse to. My mom began working everyday from morning to night. When my older brother left, I was alone; I was dealing with everything that was going on. Now, I am still rotating between my parents, but I am able to help not only my father every night with his dialysis, but my mom as well whenever she gets back from work. I still take care of my younger brother and sister and I visit my father whenever possible.
It has been fairly hard for me to accommodate to my personal life when I am busy at school. Being involved in many activities have made me constantly up and about. Being at orchestra practice 3 to 4 hours a day and track practice for 2 hours a day along with the 8 hour school day, everyday is busy. There would be times where even I can't make time for myself. I took playing the viola and running as a way to release my stress, but my father didn't like it. He felt I wasn't home enough, so he demanded that I quit. On the other hand my mother felt that I had been involved for so many years that I should continue. I ended up continuing most of what I've done. Soon, I realized that I needed to do what was best for me and not just for others. I continued to play the viola and running, and I felt as if it was my decision, that I no longer needed to feel the need to please others.
Although my older brother went to the Navy, I believe I am the first child in my family to go to college. I plan to go to University of California - Los Angeles, or one of the Universities of California. I have been trying to look for an out-of-state or private university due to the rising tuition costs in California for public education. I worry about college costs because my mother is unable to keep up with bills as it is and my father is living off disability payments because he cannot work. I believe that in the end, it would be up to me. I believe that college is worth every penny, and I am willing to do apply for any grants or scholarships in order to succeed in this part of my life.
Though I have been through rough patches in my life, I have found the strength to overcome these challenges with the help of my peers, mentors, and nonetheless my family. I know that one day, I can show others that even through rough times, you can do it. I believe that if you set your mind to something, you can achieve it no matter how long it takes. If I say I can do it, I know I can.