Tanea Lunsford On The Children Of Prisoners

Honors Student Deals With Having A Father In San Quentin

Wendy Tokuda ― San Francisco (CBS 5) ― Tanea Lunsford was wearing a bright flower in her hair when I met her. Her teacher later told me, that's her trademark- everyday she wears one. At the time, she was busy deciding whether she would go to Stanford or Columbia, after being accepted to both. She chose Columbia.

The creative writing program at the School of the Arts in San Francisco was the perfect place for Tanea. Writing was more than just a talent for her- it was a way of dealing with life. "Writing was my outlet," she said. Ultimately, it liberated her.

Tanea grew up in a home full of secrets, the first about her father being in prison. Her mother told her he was on vacation. She would ask when he was coming back, but her mother couldn't answer. She was about four when she found out the truth.

They would occasionally visit him at San Quentin: "we would stand in line for a long time, early on a Sunday morning, behind what seemed like hundreds of women in heels and too much make up and perfume trying to cover up sadness, trying to make up for the circumstances. They all looked so sorry."

Although most children might be ashamed their fathers are incarcerated, Tanea learned to deal with it, through a program for kids just like her. Project WHAT! works with the children of incarcerated parents. WHAT stands for We're Here And Talking! And they are.

"After working with Project WHAT and writing back and forth and expressing how i felt about my dad, I wasn't embarrassed by it anymore," said Tanea. "I got interested in the rights I had as a child of an incarcerated parent. I redirected my energy."

She didn't just write about it, she began to speak about her experience, sometimes going into prisons to talk with prisoners. She became interested in the rights of kids like her, 7 million in the U.S. And she takes every opportunity to speak out on their behalf.

"To be one of those voices is amazing," she said. "I want to lift up everyone else that is going through what I am."

The children of incarcerated prisons she points out, are six times more likely to go to jail. "To just defy that, totally fly in the face of it, has become one of my missions."

Tanea did a lot more than stay out of jail, excelling at school, and taking advantage of every opportunity she spotted. But, school, as it turns out, was easy compared to what she faced at home. Her mother became mentally ill, and the more ill she became, the more responsibility Tanea assumed. "She would come in from work and close herself into her room and turn off the lights….When my mom couldn't function, I would cook up dinner, wash clothes, clean the bathrooms, help my little sister with her homework…anything else that had to be done," she said.

Her mom's illness was another secret. She would tell the children there were spies watching them, or the tap water was poisoned. That's where the writing came in again. "Writing was the only way sometimes that I could describe the situation we were in, because I couldn't always talk about it especially before my mom was diagnosed, I kind of wanted to avoid that because I knew it wasn't normal. When I couldn't talk to my friend or other family members because I was hiding it, I would just write about it," Tanea said.

All that changed, when her mom set the house on fire. She was diagnosed with bipolar schizophrenia. The children went to live with their grandmother.

Tanea said her grandmother saved her. Raenette Sanders smiles at that thought. She said she told her grandchildren, "here we are. It's bad. Let's cry about it and the let's move on. Let's think about what we do have."

She would tell them how special they are, and that they didn't have to be like their parents: "You are not your mother. You are not your father. You don't have to travel that path. You can make your own path. You can break the mold, I always tell them, break out of the mold. Just break out of the mold. Do whatever you want to do. Just spread your wings and fly."

It was just what Tanea needed to hear. "When I didn't have my mom and dad my grandmother would tell me all the things I do have, not material things... She would tell me how smart I am school-wise; what attributes I did get from both of my parents."

She is an honors student, and deep thinker. Her teacher, Heather Woodward said, "I find Tanea to probably be the only student I have ever had in her situation with her level of commitment to her education." Woodward recommended her for Students Rising Above, because of her attitude. "She is always looking at everything she faces in her life as a challenge rather than an obstacle. I think that differentiation says something about her and her character."

Now, she is the first in her family to go to college. "I'm my mothers daughter my fathers daughter", Tanea said, "but going to college represents this different self and different setting and growing into a different person."

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